EB: Giving ’em the business!

Brain dumps from the original Bonehead.

The Only Reason You Need.

I once mentioned here that I'm likely the slowest eater on the face of the Earth.  Typically when someone makes a statement of such extremity it's instantly assumed to be exaggeration but in this case it's really not – if I'm not the world's slowest I've got to be pretty damn close.  It's never bothered me very much but slow eatin' ain't for everybody; there's occasionally going to be some peer pressure involved.  Even when that pressure is unspoken, there'll be some seriously impatient looks thrown your way when the rest of your group is ready to grab the check and un-ass the table but you're still meandering around the edge of your plate. 

I am eternally grateful that I was born with the sort of mutant genetics that grants me a high resilience to subtle coersion, guilt trips, and various other forms of emotional manipulation.  Don't get me wrong – if we have to keep time I'll pick up the pace a bit so as not be the Single Most Inconsiderate Fucker Ever, but other than that I don't see any point in rushing it. 

I know this is going to sound a little bit nuts so just go with me for a minute, ok?  What if the foods you chose to eat, and the way you chose to eat those foods, were none of anybody's damn business?  Sick, right?  Hey, that's just how I doo's it; but this isn't about privacy, it's about finding those little ways to take your time and do what you damn well please. 

Check the score.  If you have have responsibilities, like a job or bills or anything like that, then somewhere, at some points in your day, you've got a clock hanging there and eyeballing you – just waiting for you to get a move on.  It happens to all of us whether you have a punchcard or if you run your own business and have to be timely for your meetings with clients or investors, we've all got that clock just staring us down from time to time and there's nothing that can be done about that.  That's what makes those rare moments, when the clock isn't looking, that much more special.

That's what those moments are.  They're rare instances when you don't have think about your work or even be considerate of others feelings and you can do, or in this case eat, what you want and how you want and that's all there is to it.  Eating surely isn't the only example of this but it's one of my favorites and therefore the first to come to my mind… and I'd love to hear what yours are too!

I generally try to keep my vices to a minimum and I've accepted that eating is going to be one of them.  My selections are restricted, almost exclusively, to things that taste good to me because THIS thing is going to be MY thing.  Of course, I'm not completely closed-minded about this; I'll at the very least entertain naysayers before rewarding their contrary opinions with complimentary bottles of Shut The Fuck Up.

I try to limit this thing to an area of my life where I can be all about me and still not be a selfish prick and I think I've done a reasonably good job of it but I'm not the only one. There's an entire Slow Down movement building up steam out there preaching the same goodness about recognizing and appreciating the irreplacable value of time, the ultimate commodity. 

Do it, I urge you.   Find something that you can do by yourself that makes you feel good, where you're not infringing upon anyone elses humanity, and just go at it.  Take your sweet time and enjoy every second.  Do it because you can, and because life is too short not to.

-E

May 26, 2006 Posted by | Personal Revelations | 2 Comments

Calling out Cruise.

I wanna footrace against Tom Cruise.  I’m serious.  Have you ever watched any of his movies?  Mission Impossible 3, War of the Worlds, all the way back to Risky Business…  hell, you could probably just pick one at random and stand a legitimate chance of seeing him break out into some serious sprinting.  Sometimes, like in MI:3, I could swear it’s a camera trick!  Either way this guy can flat out book… and I think I can take him.  He seems like a competitive, high-energy kind of guy and I think he’d be up for it.

Come on Tommy boy, I’m calling you out!  I know you’re out there reading and checking my site daily for updates.  Don’t duck me man!  Just you and me, no witnesses, and I won’t tell anybody if I spank ya.  Bring it on.

-E

May 24, 2006 Posted by | Random Ramblings | 4 Comments

Hi! Can I Help You Find Something?

For awhile now some of the traffic that’s been coming to visit here has been netsurfers: somebody out there just riding the search engines and looking for something.  From time to time I’ll see a visitor and the search term they were looking for and just wonder ‘how the hell did they get here‘; but other times it just seems to make sense.  Today I had one of each:

Women givin other men head:
I’ve been thinking really hard about this one and I’m not sure how it happened.  I know it’s highly unlikely but have I written something about blowjobs that I just forgot about??

Definition giving someone “the business”:
Ah yes, an easy one!  “Giving him the business” is an expression I snatched out of pro football history.  Back in 1986 during a game between the New York Jets and the Buffalo Bills someone committed a rare kind of violent foul.  The interesting twist here was that in a sport heralded for it’s harsh physicality, this play involved Buffalo’s quarterback!  Of the dozens of different positions one can play in this game only three are granted any kind of significant protection by the rules of the game and quarterback is one of them.

It would have been the sweetest of irony if the quarterback, Jim Kelly, had been the one commiting the foul but poor Jim was on the receiving end.  After being sacked (tackled to the ground),Marty Lyons, the Jets player, began repeatedly punching Jim in the head!  Although it’s clearly against the rules there is no specific entry in the rulebook against “kicking that guy’s ass”, so the presiding referee expressed himself in the best way he knew how.  He clicked on his mic and told the crowd this:

“Number 99 of the defense, after tackling the quarterback, was giving him the business down there!”

Hilarious.  The line immediately became part of National Football League history.  Why would I choose that for the name of the site?  Because all in that one moment you have a curious, awkward, but funny mixture; one guy got mad (Lyons), one guy got hurt (Kelly), one guy was left utterly speechless (Dreith, the referee), but true to the old adage humor was in the eyes of the beholders.

-E

Correction: As pointed out by a visitor in the comments area, my reference was a bit off.  Marty Lyons wore number 93, not 99 as posted in the quotation I looked up.  Number 99 was “the New York Sack Exchange”, aka Mark Gastineau. 

May 23, 2006 Posted by | Random Ramblings, Sports | 12 Comments

One Day At The Schoolyard.

Do you remember being a kid?  Do you ever wish for those days when you could go out and play and when things didn’t go right you could call ‘Do Over’ and just make it all go away?  This was one of those days.

I once wrote up a post about The Hero Factor and to tell you the truth, that whole thing could have been composed from personal experience.  As proof of that I offer a happy little tale of a day when healthy things like rational judgment, and concern for my own safety somehow just managed to elude my grasp. 

Once upon a time my formula for “friend” selection was far less complicated than the lengthy algebraic equation I use these days.  If you go back far enough I’d consider you friend just for being there; and that’s what Mason was – he was just there.  Now, in his defense, in the years following I found Mason to be a decent, upstanding guy, but on this one afternoon he was a straight up coward. 

Me and Mase were two of the tallest kids in class for many years and back when you had to line up, shut up, and await further instructions, you were ordered to arrange yourselves in size order from shortest to tallest.  We were seated side-by-side at the back of the classroom every year and whenever we’d get split into twos it was always me and Mason, those last two guys, working on class projects together.

You’re dragging this out again.  Let’s GO!

OK!  I’m quite possibly the slowest eater on planet Earth and 25 years ago this was still true – so by the time I finished my lunch everybody was out there already!  So this one day I head out to the schoolyard and see a massive crowd standing around what appears to be some sort of brawl.  As a child I’d always been taught to stay away from that scene because there was nothing good that could come of it but sometimes you can’t just hear it, you have to see it for yourself. 

As I close in on the center of the crowd I see five guys having at it.  One white and four black.  When I get a little close I can make out a face – it’s Mason, and though fighting back vigorously, the four black guys are handing him a proper ass-kicking.  I was absolutely enraged.  Without hesitation and without consideration for consequence or safety, I put my head down and charged straight in there. 

I made my way through the crowd as they were stomping him out and barreled into one of Mase’s assailants.  Though extraordinarily slight of frame, I had very good speed and delivered a solid blow that floored him!  “Back off!!”, I ordered. 

You’re full of shit.  You didn’t say that.

No, I really did.  What can I say, I watched alot of TV when I was a kid!  Anyway, the looks on those four guys faces was priceless.  There I stood, between them and Mason, almost as big as the smallest of them and completely fearless.  The crowd went silent.  And then came the fist across my cheek…

Over what felt like the next three or four hours I got beaten like a drum.  I took it like a champ and stayed on my feet and even got in a few decent punches of my own.  If you’ve ever been rocked on the jaw real good you know how it wickedly time can get distorted afterwards.  Your mind races and everything slows down and minutes can feel like hours.  Amidst this one-sided melee I saw something that froze me. 

Uh yeah.  Just for the record: Freezing up is not a good thing when you’re getting jumped by four guys.

I saw Mason!  Eye-to-eye!  He was on his feet, looking relatively uninjured, and watching excitedly from among the crowd!! 

That sonofabitch!  He was fighting off four guys by himself while the rest of his so-called friends watched!?  And when you came to help him he just walked off?  He didn’t even go for help???  He just stood there!?

Yes he did.  Just after that brief moment of bewilderment came yet another unpleasant wakeup call.

Got rocked upside the head again?

Yeah.  But by then I had already switched gears mentally; I’d gone from running on instinct to actually thinking again.  That’s why things slow down when you’re all amped up like that.  Your brain disconnects and you just do what comes naturally.  Thinking will slow up your reflexes.  The good part was that I remembered I had been practicing karate, then delivered a beautiful kick that doubled over one of my attackers; the bad news is with my mind re-engaged, I got pummelled to the ground when I stopped to admire the results of that kick. 

It didn’t take much longer after that for the school aides to arrive and break it up and though I took a few lumps there was no real harm done.  It was literally a painful lesson to learn, but one that we all learn and I’m glad I got it out of the way early in life.  In retrospect I regretted putting myself at risk to try and help Mason, but if that same kind of thing were to happen to one of my friends today I’d still charge right in there.  I’ve just been far more selective since then about who gets to bear the title of “Friend”.

-E

May 20, 2006 Posted by | Personal Revelations | 4 Comments

What it is and what it ain’t.

This morning there was a discussion on the radio about cheating in relationships.  My usual game of dodgeball became rather involved today so I wasn't able to really focus in on the conversation but it went more or less like this:

Guy DJ: My girlfriend is pissed off at me.
Girl DJ: Why is that?
Guy DJ: Because she says I cheated on her.
Girl DJ: Why would she say something like that??
Guy DJ: Because I slept with someone else.
Girl DJ: Then she's right!!  You did cheat on her!!
Guy DJ: No I didn't, she's only my girlfriend.  It's not cheating until you're married.

You have the right to remain silent.  Anything you say can and will be used against you…

Knock it off.  What are you so scared of anyway?

Ever hear of a can of worms?  Does the name Pandora mean anything to you?

Whatever… let's just run this one and see where it goes.  Ok – so this guy's point of argument is 'why is she getting all worked up if she's not my wife?', and his co-host's response to that is 'well duh! because you fucked somebody other than her!'. 

Now, typically, in a battle-of-the-sexes, it's easier for me to see his side than it is to see her's but I'd have to call this one of those rare exceptions.  Conceptually, 'cheating' is kinda like 'working'; it's definition is very much open to individual interpretation.  The line could be drawn at touching or kissing or anywhere else, really.  Depending on who you ask you'll hear answers ranging from 'emotional infidelity is committed by fantasizing about someone else'; whereas others will go so far as to say 'you can do what you want as long as you don't do it with anyone I know and I never have to hear about it', which is basically a variant of the 100-mile rule. 

To be fair, we should leave polyamory out of this because, although you can still cheat in a polyamorous relationship, we're just not comparing apples to apples anymore.  Besides that, the argument that sex is a natural act while marriage is just another invention is quite a compelling one that could take some time to sort out.  Anyway, if you want to be technical you can go you your dictionary and look up "cheating" but don't expect to find anything useful there.  With such a broad range of possible, yet valid, definitions it stands to reason that he has no way of knowing that his girlfriend would draw the line at penetration unless they'd discussed the topic first, right? 

Yeah, but it's not gonna go down like that.  If they haven't discussed it then the first time he cheats on her is kinda like a gimme because he didn't know better. 

Ah yes, that ages old quip: It's better to ask forgiveness than permission.  I love that line.  In a get-it-done-at-all-costs scenario there's no question it's the right way of thinking but how often do we really, really find ourselves in that kind of predicament?  This isn't about life or death, it's about getting your feels.  When the action is the single most important thing then you're clearly better off doing it than filing a request for permission; but when the consequences to the action, in this case hurting someone important to you, outweighs the action itself then I'd advise carefully considering the cost of admission.

Yeah but none of that applies unless you get caught.  And if 'the cost of admission' really is worth taking your chances then what?

Then do your thing.  Whatever your thing may be, do your thing…  'cause above all else, you gotta be you.

-E

May 15, 2006 Posted by | Relationships | 4 Comments

Can’t Get Right.

Situation: Driver in Acura coupe fails to signal but otherwise, properly, attempts to move aside and let driver in Ford SUV overtake in the passing lane; Ford driver, anticipating that the Acura driver will do as many other SoFL drivers do, chooses not to wait for a courtesy that often isn't displayed at all and simply goes right to execute the pass.

Remember that Bobbing and Weaving thing I did where I was trying to understand all the nonsensical dipping and dodging that people will paint on the freeways down here in South Florida?  I saw it again on my way home from work last night and, as loathe as I am to admit this, it's actually starting to make sense. 

First things first – since all this was going to take place up ahead I applied the brakes.  Believe me, I could care less about having a great view; I just wanted some extra room to maneuver in case things got ugly.  Have you ever seen that motion a car makes when the driver goes but then suddenly yanks it back into place?  That kind of a snaping/wobbling looking movement, right?  Yeah well when that Acura driver realized the Ford was following them over that's what happened and it's usually a bad thing.  Back in the day, my friend/driving instructor used to tell me "it's all about smooth" and for good reason – jerky movements will disrupt your vehicle's balance and that make you into a roadside decoration. 

Fortunately there was no big bang but the end result is the Acura driver nearly got nailed in the ass for trying to do the right thing.  That was really important – did you get it?  The Acura driver nearly got nailed in the ass for trying to do the right thing.  I used to find it infuriating that these squatters will to go all the way over to the passing lane to pitch camp down here in sunshine land but eventually I just got used to it.  That doesn't make it ok, I just lowered my expectations.  Look, when paying your taxes on time incurs fines, or when pedestrians are safer crossing against a green light instead of with it, shit's pretty fucked up… and though I often focus on the drivers I don't blame them for all this, I blame the police.

"When in Rome", my ass.

-E

May 14, 2006 Posted by | Driving | 4 Comments

Just A Little Tiny Bit Fraudulent.

Around a year or so ago I saw this pretty funny stoner flick called "Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle"; a movie featuring, among other things, Doogie Houser like you've never seen him before…  As if the title wasn't a dead giveaway the plot involves our heroes, Harold and Kumar, trying to make their way to White Castle to satisfy a spontaneous but undeniable craving for those tasty little steamed burgers.

You watched that bullshit?

I did.  What can I say – I'm a movie guy.  I was home, it came on, I didn't have anything better to do…  Ok, so as our heroes are embarking upon their quest the encounter resistance from (hit the music) The Bad Guys!!!  I don't know any of their names… probably something like Biff, Chaz, and Duke… whatever, I'll just call them The Bad Guys.  In a nutshell, they were a bunch of testosterone tweaked, macho's with a passion for extreme sports, snack foods with the word extreme in it, and making multi-digit hand/finger signs while screaming out "Extreme!!!" at the top of their lungs.  No, I'm not making this up.

Ok, so as the picture begins to come into focus you can start to see these guys somewhat.  Profiling right?  It's ok, we all do it.  It's all a part of learning and, recognizing patterns is considered one of the signs of intelligence; if every tall guy you met had red hair and you didn't think it odd when you came across a dark-haired guy standing 6'6, there may be something wrong with you.  Anyway, you can see the formation of a basic type here right?  Abercrombie-Lean and wearing jeans bought faded from the store, a "vintage" t-shirt, maybe some sort of wristband or choker, and wool skullcap in the middle of fucking summer…  You with me so far?

Why the hell do MEN wear chokers?

No.  Leave that one alone…  Ok now where was I??  So The Bad Guys are being bad guys and eventually our heroes, 'Roldy and Kumar, end up borrowing their SUV.  Kind of a long story there, but go with it.  The guys pop in a cassette called Extreme Mix or some horseshit like that and, far from what they were expecting, they're then treated to the melodic harmonizing of 90s pop group Wilson Phillips

The three chicks? 

Yes sir, that's right!!  Wilson Phillips!  Check this out – I've met some pretty tough hombres in my time.  Don't ask me why but for some reason "hombre" sound tougher than "guys", "dudes", "fellas", etc…  maybe it's because, in my head, it invokes Sam Elliot's voice and how can THAT be anything but tough?  I'm talking about some rock hard cats here and every last one of them had a soft underbelly.   Guys that secretly dig Celine Dion and chick flicks.  Why was it ok watching Al Pacino or Richard Gere tango in their movies but watching Hulk Hogan dance with his wife on VH1 just felt wrong?

C'mon guys, you know it's happened.  You're on the couch putting some mileage on the clicker and not really paying much attention.  You're distracted.  You snap back in when the phone rings.  You realize you've been watching Natalie Portman and Susan Sarandon cry and bitch about their feelings for the past half hour and for some God forsaken reason you can't wait to find out what happens next.  On your phone is one of your boys and instinctively the bass in your voice clicks up about three notches.  Then your eyes spring wide open as you hear the television out of your free ear and, to keep the peace, you reach for the mute button before anyone finds out…

Damn.  Where's Tim Allen when you need him?

-E

May 9, 2006 Posted by | Random Ramblings | 2 Comments

Drinking the Kool-Aid.

Ok – I've got my 10-foot pole and my tap shoes and it's time to go do this thing.  I just watched what could possibly be one of the most distressing, disturbing videos I've ever seen in my life.  If you are easily offended, sensitive to profanity, or otherwise intolerant, I don't recommend you watch this video:

Spirit of Truth

If you decided not to that's cool too but the rest of this post might not make as much sense to you so you may want to just skip it and come back to hang later; but if you checked it out then let's roll…

Now, none of us are new here, right?  We've all made and heard enough jokes that we've probably developed a good sense for when someone's being genuine and when someone's just fucking around.  And that's what makes this video so genuinely frightening – this man isn't kidding!  He's not joshing or joking or pulling your leg.  He thinks he is giving testimony.  Did you get that loud and clear?  He thinks he is giving testimony.    

Dawg – I'm really glad you brought the pole for this one!

Fa' really real!  Notice his choice of words…  Listen to his voice…  Look at his haircut for fuck's sake!!  This man is serious (delirious?).  When you can speak with conviction and make statements like:

  • Bitch, I'm flowin' straight from the survival scroll!
  • Is you down with that?  If you ain't down with that shut yo' goddamn ass up!

I think it's safe to say that "one of these kids is doing his own thing".  Don't be fooled by the funky soundtrack, there is nothing haphazard about this presentation; he is quoting George Clinton and the King James Bible both liberally and accurately.  No accidents.  The televangelist featured here is both ministering and, simultaneously, employing more 'motherfuckers' than Eddie Murphy in the early 80s. 

I know that for a long time I've been saying that a person's intentions should dictate the appropriate response to the words they say but in this video we may have reached the extreme condition at which this rule no longer applies.  Whatever the denomination of this man's faith is, it would be better served if he weren't preaching it!  If you can imagine using a fork to try and dig a ditch you'll get the idea – the effort may be noble and the intention admirable, but it's simply not the right tool for the job. 

What I can't help but wonder is how many times this kind of thing has happened because, in the history of the world, this surely can't be the first.  If that can be accepted as true, all as part of the fallibility of man and his feeble little flesh, then what other truths can we accept?  For instance, how can we possibly know that no other men along the way had gotten their signals crossed just as badly as this poor slob did?  What if that man was named Mohammed?  Moses?  Or even King James I of England?  If even the potential exists that this can be true, than how can anyone hope to know what to believe in?

The ball is in play.  Have fun with it…

 -E

May 7, 2006 Posted by | Religion | Leave a comment

By Request: “Oooooo say can you wiki-wiki-wik-seeee…”

Ok, so here we are: Cinco de Mayo and this whole immigration thing has reached a boil.  This thing is big… no, huge.  Actually, that's still understated – we're talking about Andre the Giant-sized, holy shit big!  Oh come on, you know who he is!  Let's look at it starting with December 16th, 2005.  The House of Representatives passed a bill authorizing greater use of law enforcement to control illegal immigration, including a massive wall along the Mexican border, felony prosecution for illegal immigrants and those assisting them.  How do you like that grouping: Terrorists, murderers, rapists, and undocumented immigrants.  Think about it…  And by the way, that "passed a bill" link I slipped in there is pretty cool – not only can you get the verbiage of the bill but you can also get updated on it as the status changes if happens to be a hot button item for you. 

Now, some say that in a post-9/11 America it is more important than ever for us to secure our borders and I say that’s great if you really mean it.  While listening to NPR radio the other day, the callers expressed some great points on this topic.  One that stood out in my mind is that we're going to put a big wall up on the Mexican border but none on the Canadian border?  Is it because Mexicans are fleeing into America but Americans are fleeing into Canada?  Well, not exactly, but did you know that W's re-election drove record numbers of Americans to Canada's immigration website? Another good question is, at the heart of the matter, is this really just a thing about Mexicans?  You hear stories all the time about people making it here from Cuba paddling in a refrigerator but trying to make that same trip from Haiti will earn you an unpleasant date with the Coast Guard.  And how often during any of these discussions does anybody bring up the numbers of immigrants from Europe or Asia or elsewhere?  I guess all immigrants aren't created equal?

Then, there's been lots of talk about how important immigrants are to America's economy… you know, all the chatter about doing jobs that Americans won't do.  First off, I think the concept is extraordinarily arrogant, even for us, but most importantly it's a load of BS.  When you've got farmhands that will put on a plastic sleeve and go shoulder deep up a cow's asshole, you can find guys that will do anything.  CNN reports that there are approximately 50 million employable citizens in this country that aren't working and nearly 12 million illegal immigrants of which nearly 60% are employed (the largest concentration of which is in the farming and construction industries where they make up 24% and 14% of the labor force, respectively).  It's really beginning to sound like the problem, like so many others, is like rooted in dollar signs. 

If you're here illegally you're not part of the system.  Medical benefits and such are no longer your employer's concern and neither is a fair, "living" wage.  Forget about the amount of money that companies spend on benefit packages whether you use them or not, just for a moment, and let's look at exchange rates.  Right now, the average Mexican citizen is making around 46 pesos/day which is the equivalent of about $4/day; you couldn't get an American citizen to just sit and stare at you (much less, do any actual work!) for that kind of money.  And talk about win-win??  Forget about comp time – if your guy gets hurt you just pick a different guy off the truck tomorrow!  This is exploitation at it's finest.

The flip side to all this is that cheap labor should lead to cheap goods.  I wouldn't dare discredit the invincible power of greed, but this is one of the counter arguments I've heard: Do you want to pay $800k to purchase a home or $300k?   Meaning, if companies are forced to spend more on labor you'd best believe that the additional expense will be subsidized out of your paycheck.  It's a stunning counter because it makes the issue both personal and expensive for everyone no matter what your lineage.  Anyone that wants buy food to eat or a home to live in would be negatively impacted by not having illegal immigrants here busting their asses for $20/day.  I'd love to give you an answer for that one but the truth is I just don't know.  Tax cuts for compliance, and stiff fines for violators could help, but we're talking about a significant amount of money here.  Maybe providing "free" labor comprised of welfare recipients and inmates in those two industries hit the hardest would lessen, if not entirely offset the difference? 

Whatever the answer is, amnesty certainly isn't it.  Not only does it not provide new opportunities for the nation's unemployed but what message does it send to the millions of citizens that emigrated legally??  The people that waited in line and learned the language and took the test…?  They were rewarded for their patience and hard work with citizenship!  One of the best quotes I've seen from this side of the issue came from a Latino man, and retired Colonel, who said "…we and millions like us did it legally.  We're all here today to tell those protesters, 'You do not speak for me.'"  The colonel isn't the only one – there are websites like 'No Illegals' where immigrants and others have organized to battle back based on the contention that "We as American Citizens and Legal Immigrants have been sold out for the cheap labor and corporations that control our political system…"  Amnesty won't do; if you begin a policy of giving away what once had to be earned you are not helping.

And then there's the Star Spangled Bwiki-bwiki-bwiki-banner.  Somewhere in here I think is the other greatest constituent to the great immigration dilemma of the day: fear.  Basically, a Brit hooked up with some Latin musicians and reworked the Star Spangled Banner into 'Nuestro Himno', which translates to 'Our Anthem' in English.  Can you say mixed reactions?  Initially I wasn't a big fan of the idea when I first heard about it but then I came across some interesting pieces of information: First, there is no officially declared national language in the United States; and second, the U.S is fifth in the world in total Spanish-speaking population!  All of this got me to thinking, again, about how language is used and whether benign intentions are enough? 

The song isn't dissing or mocking or in any other way downing the country or the song.  It's just a new version.  A way for one of the many different peoples that inhabit this nation to say "this our thang too"… and believe me this isn't the first time.  What can anyone possibly find more offensive about this version than any other?  The song gets butchered on a regular basis – the most famous of which, I think, was at Woodstock.  If acid had a signature sound, it'd damn sure have been Jimi that day…  you could even hear when it kicked in and just took control of his mind.  And just like the present, many were opposed to this new creative rendition.  What's really the big deal about a Spanish-language version of a song that a good number of American's don't know the words to anyway? 

The big deal is dominion.  Fear.  R&B versions aren't always well received but at least they're in English.  Everyone from Robert Goulet to Natalie Gilberthas publicly forgotten the words from time to time but at least they tried to do it "right".  If you're singing my song and I can't understand what you're saying then what good is it?  But that's just the point – it's not your song, it's our song.  Or rather, it's Nuestro Himna… so get over yourselves.

-E

May 5, 2006 Posted by | Politics | 1 Comment